Three “Happiness” Fundamentals

Good morning, dear reader! It has been a while, has it not? I promised you a few posts ago that I’d only write if I had something important on my mind. By the time 2022 ended, I felt I had been writing for the sake of writing, to make deadlines, and stay on course. I was beginning to feel the content made no sense – and – even worse – made no difference.

I tried my hand at that YouTube channel I mentioned here, but alas, I’ve dropped that project. There are so many reasons, but let’s just say…it isn’t a medium I can get behind. I’m not a social/digital influencer by any means, and I’ve witnessed first hand how nasty people can be in the comments section. Heck, I had to block a twelve-year-old from my ten-year-old’s channel for cyberbullying. It’s crazy how nasty people have gotten. So I find myself centering on a few select people and sticking to a small crowd these days. To say I don’t trust a single soul might be a slight exaggeration. I trust a few, but only a few.

Writing has always been a healing process for me, but lately, I’ve been in the thick of things, too busy to write. Instead, I’ve taken on a few advanced-level courses, tried to study photography, and focused primarily on my kiddo. But if I told you I didn’t miss writing, I’d be lying. I do miss it, whether it makes a difference or not.

So, today, we are gathered for the first post of 2023. Seems silly to launch nearly six weeks into a year, but here we are you and me. So…

I believe I’ve figured out three fundamental ways to be happier – at least the three that work for me – and I wanted to share them with you. They may help. (Okay, maybe I had a little help along the way from Alexander Chalmers and my buddies over at Life Simplified, but still…)

First, let me set this up by saying: I don’t like to be idle. I’m cool with a free Saturday here and there, but the whole ‘sleep, eat, work, repeat’ routine isn’t my thing. However, nothing I’m about to suggest requires a lot of money or experience. You don’t have to fly to Brazil and eat live beetles or anything. Unless, of course, you want to. Then you do you, Boo.

No, what I’m about to suggest is more calm. So, grab that drink. Settle in. Here we go…

Find something to do. For about three months in 2021, I didn’t do much after work but dive deep into Nurse Jackie on Netflix, drink wine until bedtime, and gain ten pounds. Realizing this wasn’t the most productive use of my time or talents…I now have plenty to do. I write. I am taking classes. I’m engaged in activities in my community. For example, right now, it is tax season in the United States and every other Saturday, I volunteer with the VITA program preparing taxes for low-to-middle-income families. Do I love doing taxes? Not necessarily. But I love helping people, and it reminds me just how fortunate I am.

Have someone to love. I don’t need to dive deep into how much I adore my son. He’s the most important person in my life, and being a late-in-life mother makes me believe – on some level – that the Universe chose me to be his mom. He’s a tad bit unique, this kid, and a lot of parents don’t have what it takes to be an advocate for a child like that. If you ask him today, “What’s mom’s job?” he’ll answer, “To protect me”. And I do. I wish I had room in my heart to love others the way I love him, but honestly, I don’t think I’m wired that way and don’t have the bandwidth. He is my number one priority. That kinda sucks for my love life, but – sigh – such is life.

Have something to hope for. People in depression will often say they’ve lost hope in the future. Some people who have lost hope in the future will not admit they are depressed, too, but that’s an entirely different post altogether. I work for an organization that grants wishes to children with critical illnesses. Often, the children and their families will state that even the thought of the upcoming ‘wish’ gives them hope to carry on. So, my wish? I’m planning a trip to Norway. I’ve started saving the money, and I’ve started clipping photos to put on my Vision Board. I’ve got an entire board on Pinterest dedicated to ‘things to do in Norway’. I may never get to Norway. But I’m damn sure looking forward to it and hoping for the best.

That’s the post today, reader. Short & sweet – just like I try to be. But before I let you go…I can’t forget to share a song with you. I love it when I can highlight local artists on this blog and I checked out a local thing called Sofar Sounds last Friday (there might be one in your area. Check here.). I finally got to see and hear Justin Larkin. He’s a local guy, and everyone talks so highly of him – as a musician and good human. I liked him, his vibe, and his songs, which you can find here. This one was my favorite. Ever thought someone wrote a song just for you? Yep. Nowhere Is A Place pretty much took up permanent residency in my heart that night. The line “I’d rather spend time burning bridges than time kissin’ ass” makes me giggle every time. I was hoping you could have a listen and let me know what you think.

Before you go…tell me…what do you hope for? What do you do when you aren’t earning that paycheck? Who do you love more than life itself? Comment below and enlighten me!

7 thoughts on “Three “Happiness” Fundamentals

  1. Welcome back! I missed these.
    I love my children more than myself. For all the good, bad and the individuals they are.
    Dream, that’s what I do. I use to get in trouble all the time for daydreaming in school. Now, I try to live my dreams as much as possible.
    My hope is that my dreams never stop.
    P.s. You’ll always have a spot on my couch. 😘

    • I love it when people 1) answer my questions and 2) LISTEN TO THE SONG!!! I am planning a trip there, too, if only for a night. ❤ I love you, Bon Bon.

    • Thank you so much for reading! Through the years you have always been my cheerleader! And what’s not to love about Stuart? Right??

  2. Good to see a blog! I enjoy these! My family is my number one priority. I got burned out on relationships years ago and am pretty darn content. I do love my job too. Owning a business and depending on that business to pay your bills can be stressful, but very rewarding. The positives outweigh the negatives and I doubt I ever work for anyone but me again. I am a strict boss though. Lots of weekends worked but I am getting better about me time!

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